My Sanity in Question

Once again I've been writing posts in my head. Seems the only time I have to actually think is driving in the car. So, bullets...

• New cell phone! YAY! Why do they have so many gadgets now? And why does it cost so much to use them?
• New camera! YAY! Still figuring it all out. And still feeling guilty for spending all that money that could have gone into the house.
• Hummingbird has been coming to feed at my honeysuckle the last 2 evenings between 8:30ish and 8:45ish. I'm so glad I noticed. It feels luxurious to spend those 15 minutes just watching for him. (I'm thinking the fact it seems like a huge luxury is not a good sign.)
• Turning off the expressway and feeling the wind caress my face each day on my way home. Lovely. Luxurious. A reason to not be pissed the air conditioning in the van is on the fritz.
• Serious need for a weekend BY. MY. SELF. I don't know how you all do it. I need at least a weekend a year away from the kids to keep my sanity. It's been over a year. Now that I've identified the fact I can't hold out much longer I can't decide between:
• A weekend home alone to clean the damn house.
• A weekend at a friend's doing things like going out for dinner and ... well, whatever else one does when with friends. (It's been way too long.)
• A weekend at my mom's where I can watch TV/movies during the day and not do or plan or arrange anything.
• A weekend spent visiting family that lives about 6 hours away.
• I know I should DO something. I should clean. I should visit. But I really want to spend a beautiful day lounging on the couch and watching TV. It seems so wrong.

That's all I've got. NEED VACATION.